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  • Writer's pictureBarbara Perleberg

Blogging live - Profiles in Courage Part 2 - from the Governing Board Meeting

Updated: May 17, 2018

Okay, I know I am not supposed to live blog while the board meeting is going on, but they are talking about the number stuff now and that is the part of the meeting I never really understand so this is as good a time as any to get back to my profile of me.

Well I thought I would devote this section to occasions where I have demonstrated my courageous leadership of the district. Remember, I have written about my courageous leadership. In fact, when I was asked on August 24, 2016 by the Scottsdale Independent why I deserved to be on the Governing Board, I wrote this answer down:

Question: Why are you qualified to run for the Scottsdale Schools governing board?

Every board member must be willing and able to critically assess that the district is responsibly and efficiently utilizing resources to meet and exceed stakeholder expectations. I have proven in the past four years on the board that I clearly understand, support, and fight for the high academic and fiscal expectations of our community. I have demonstrated courageous leadership in asking the insightful questions and engaging meaningful conversations to drive positive, significant change within SUSD.

If you read what I wrote and have no idea what it means, trust me, you are not alone. I am not even sure what it was that I was trying to say, but I do know that it worked. I am on the board and you are not. But this gives you a good idea as to why I am the subject of the first Profile in Courage. Because I told the paper I am courageous, my courage has therefore been verified and when you understand the lengths that I have gone to to eliminate a very pesky member of the SUSD constituency, you will know that I am doubly courageous.

Okay - I don't want to get off track but Pam Kirby just said to Dr. Virgil:

Holy sh-t, I can not believe she fessed up to that.

Okay, this is the story how, on Kay's command, I drew the short straw, along with Denise, was assigned to eliminate Susan Hughes, the number one enemy of the District. So here is the deal with Susan, she is just persistent, like in an uncommon way. Hold on, I have to talk now so I'm talking about pie, and relating the money for teacher salaries to pie, and I'm talking about new dollars and where they are all going. Sh-t, I forgot to talk about the capital budget and I just wanted to cut Dr. Virgil off, but now we are hearing about capital.

Okay, back to Susan and her being persistent. So look, there is like $200 plus million dollars floating around here and no one should get too upset if some of that money ends up in account we have labeled as the "fun" account. Like when we want to travel, and don't want to pay for it ourselves, or when we want a little dinner and don't want to pay for that either, well that money comes out of the "fun" account, or, we just get a vendor to foot the bill. And trust me, if Susan was not a constituent of the District, I would not have been assigned to eliminate her with Denise, so in a way it is her fault. But trust me on this, you can not steal a pencil eraser around here without Susan Hughes finding out about it and that is the beginning of a nightmare because she latches on to exposing District theft like white on rice. So you can see why she is such a problem. I don't know what kind of doctor she is, but Kay says she must have been a proctologist because she is just up our asses all day long.

So when operation Ixnay Usansay Uhgeshay was assigned to me and Denise by Kay, we decided to put together some molotav cocktails so that we could throw them at her. Well, the salient issue, or the important ingredient making these molotav cocktails is that you need some gasoline. Denise told me she has used them before to silence a critic, so she knows how to make them. Well, Denise said that the thing here to remember is that you just don't want to go to the gas station and buy gasoline because those stations have cameras and we have to get the gas another way. So I told Denise that when I worked at Z-Seven Funds as Corporate Secretary and Compliance officer, that my boss sent me out each day to fill up his car with gas and because he never wanted to pay for it, I got really good at siphoning the gas from mobile homes that were parked in a trailer park nearby, so I suggested we just get the gas that way, no muss, no fuss. So Denise was cool with it, and she never has any pocket money anyways, so off we went to Mesa, near where I used to work, and we set about getting some gasoline the old fashioned way.

Now I don't know if you have ever siphoned gasoline, but the fastest way to do it is to put one end of the hose into the tank, and then for some unknown scientific reason, you have to be lower than the fluid you are siphoning. You then have to suck like you are trying to get a golfball through a garden hose, and then when your mouth fills up with gasoline, you quit sucking unless you like huffing, and then you put the end of the hose into the gerry can, which had better be on the ground, lower than the gas tank in the mobile home. So this is what we had planned for operation Ixnay Usansay Uhgeshay. It's funny, but I never minded doing this on my lunch hour when I worked at Z-Seven Funds, but when I was sneaking around in the dark siphoning gas, I realized that it was not as fun as it once was. Okay, so Denise and I got into an argument about who was going to do the sucking, and we played rock-scissors-paper, best two out of three, and I think I saw her stutter when she shot the last time, but again, rock smashes scissors. I did not remember these mobile home parks being so well lit, so we had to drive around the park for about ten minutes to find a darkened area without good street lighting where I could get on my back and Denise could ease the hose into the tank. So, here is what happened. I got down on my back, just like old times, but Denise did not have her readers with her, and instead of unscrewing the gas cap, she unscrewed the cap on the sewer evacuation tank and slid the hose in. So there I was, lying on my back, sucking to beat the band and boy did I get a surprise. In about two minutes my mouth filled with sewage and I don't know who lives in that trailer, but they need to ease up on the corn. And worst of all, when I yanked my head away, the sewage splattered all down the front of my shirt. Denise was laughing so hard at me, and I will tell you this, if she does go to prison, that will be the only possible way to make up for what happened to me on that night. Well, to make a long story short, Denise made me ride in the trunk of her BMW because she said she did not want to have the whole car smelling like sh-t. Of course, we had to scrap the whole operation Ixnay Usansay Uhgeshay, but the point is this: you don't know what courage is until you are siphoning sewage in the middle of the night in an attempt to silence a critic. And you know, when we were helping all our friends at the construction companies and Roubichaux make all that money by turning a blind eye to what Susan Hughes was telling us and the newspapers, Kay said, "sometimes to get ahead in life you have to swallow a little sh-t" and I wonder if this is what she was talking about.

Okay, so here is something else that should be in my Profile in Courage: I am very proud of my work as a compliance offer and Corporate Secretary at Z-Seven Funds and you would know that because I list this experience on the SUSD Governing Board website, which bolsters my credibility. Well, I think one of the reasons that I was so comfortable with Kay's, Denise's, Louis', and Laura Smith's financial shenanigans and let it slide was that the guy I worked with for four years when I was the compliance officer and secretary at Z-Seven Funds and Top Fund Management, Inc. were run by Barry Ziskin, a real life financial manipulator who was barred in 2012

from association with any broker, dealer, investment adviser, municipal securities dealer, municipal advisor, transfer agent, or nationally recognized statistical rating organization; and prohibited from serving or acting as an employee, officer, director, member of an advisory board, investment adviser or depositor of, or principal underwriter for, a registered investment company or affiliated person of such investment adviser, depositor, or principal underwriter.

Well I was long gone from Z-Seven Funds and Top Fund Management, Inc. when this all caught up with Barry, because I left in 2002, but back in the day, when I joined Z-Seven Funds in 1999, it was just the two of us. You can see I am not fooling about this, just check here and you can see my name and the position that I held as the only other officer at these two companies. Now I can absolutely say, that aside from me siphoning gas during my lunch hour from the trailer park across the street (which is all we had for fun before Words With Friends), there was nothing wrong going on when I was a secretary and officer there, and I absolutely did not know that Barry was in trouble with the SEC in 1987. I mean even though there were only two officer at the company, it was a pretty large place and how would I know if something fishy was going on, especially a decade after I left. A compliance officer must comply, and like at the District, I complied with what I was told to do. So to be sure, there was something funny going on with Barry's businesses before I got there, and about a decade after I left, but not while I was there. But truly, I see my position at both the District now and in the decade before the SEC shut down Barry's companies akin to that great war hero, Sergeant Schultz:

Ok, and here is the heartbreaker of all time, while I was checking on the status of the APB issued for ADB, AKA Sancho Panza, I stumbled across the horrifying news that my former boss, Barry, has been charged by the State of Arizona with a whole load of crimes. So it just goes to show you that you never really know who you might have been working with.

Okay, this is the end of part two on my Profile in Courage part two, Chapter One. I think I have a bit more to say about me.

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